ALL WE EVER NEEDED was to be loved and held.
Just as we are. Not because we have done something right, have performed well, have gotten good grades, are good looking like a vogue model, have lost these extra pounds, got a good and successful career, or we are the perfect parent…
NO, ALL WE EVER NEEDED was to be seen as perfect as we are. Not seen as a project of parents, partners or friends to be changed and molded into an image based on an expectation and belief who and what we should be.
In fact, ALL WE EVER NEEDED was to be loved and accepted for who we are, for our being and our unique essence, not for what we do or what we could be useful for or for how successful we are. Not as a part of a calculated if this… then that condition and excel function.
No! ALL WE EVER NEEDED was to feel nurtured and nourished unconditionally.
No matter where we look in this world, we see billions of wounded inner children walking around, who have learned to believe that they are not enough.
That they have to be different. That they have to behave in certain ways to be accepted and loved. That they have to compete to stick out of the crowd, to be better compared to others. That something is wrong with them because they don’t fit in. That they need to collect badges and labels and roles to be someone of value. Or have to just do something so confronting, to at least get some attention.
And all of them think they are the only ones who are feeling this way! Because nobody talks about it!
We have all been believing this story of not being enough, of not being worthy of love for so long. We all feel guilt for not doing enough and shame for not being enough, eating us up from the inside.
So all we could do to distract ourselves and to prevent pain was to blame and judge someone else, so they would feel guilty and ashamed, too! Or we are blaming and judging ourselves. At least we get a confirmation for our beliefs this way.
All we could do is to numb ourselves with alcohol, drugs, binge eating, binge watching, binge working etc., or go on antidepressants, to not have to feel anything anymore, because feelings are not okay either.
We learned we needed to have a strong opinion and have to stand our ground based on the beliefs we were conditioned with, to be and fight for or against something to belong, to be of value, and to have some power (over others) and to change this world.
While ALL WE EVER NEEDED was being compassionately held and accepted, when we were angry or sad, to be seen in our pain, and our feelings being acknowledged as something beautiful, valuable and important.
Instead, we have learned to shove it back down, to keep it under control. To show “we got this!”, and to ask people to leave us alone, because we can do it alone. To prove we are strong. So our mommy and daddy can be proud of us!
Because if we did break down and cry, we would end up being labeled with all kinds of diseases that would label us as „weak“ and „not functioning“ and „not enough“. What a shame!
With all that we have learned, how would we ever understand that the only change needed is within? Our own perspective?
Just stop. Stop being so hard on yourself. Break that vicious cycle. Give yourself a break. Rest. Breathe. Relax. Reflect instead of reacting.
You can decide here and now to end this game.
Allow all these suppressed demons to come out, allow them to leave! Allow for a reset, allow yourself to feel.
Be soft and kind with yourself, give yourself the space to be vulnerable. Allow yourself to loosen the grip and pressure you have put on yourself, allow yourself to be tender and raw.
Stop trying to have your shit together, nobody has!
Allow yourself to let go, of all these beliefs and stories you have built around yourself, other people, and the world.
Give yourself permission to fall into the sea of unresolved feelings and fears, allow all the unresolved pain, shame and guilt to surface. Be that lovely mess you need to be in that moment.
Love every single feeling without any judgment, drama or story, and let it release with your screams and your tears. Love and hold yourself through it, allow it all to leave with gratitude for the new empty space within.
Because you ARE enough. You are perfect as you are. You always have been. Set yourself free from the prison of unworthiness you have built around yourself. Let your protective walls around your heart tumble down. Drop your armour, drop your weapons. Feel the peace within in that pure empty space where you meet yourself at your purest, most honest and authentic level.
ALL WE EVER NEEDED was to be able to be our true authentic self. To not have to live in permanent compromise with our unique essence.
We are all just innocent, wounded children, trying to find our way home in this seemingly cold, brutal, and lonely world. To be loved and to be safe. But we never felt truly fulfilling love, we confused, resources and possessions for feeling safe and nurtured. How could we know any better? Nobody told us!
We believed we needed a partner and a family to be loved and fulfilled and safe. But oh my, they never behave the way we want them to be! And so it continues. Wounded inner children hurting and hurting each other, because everyone is so afraid to not be enough, and to not survive.
Can you see the loop we’re in? (If not read again from the beginning).
In truth, ALL THAT WE EVER NEEDED was unconditional love.
Yet, we have been taught how scary love is. To fear it, to protect ourselves from it. To not trust anyone, they might just use and abuse you. You need to protect yourself to stay safe. The world is a dangerous place. We have learned to fear and mistrust. We have never experienced true love. All we have experienced are attachments and dependencies.
We just could not see or feel true love. Although it has been there all along. Our mistrust, judgment and fear are the only things blocking us from it.
Just stop. Open your heart to yourself. See yourself through the lense of unconditional love. This is the key to a new world filled with unconditional love.
You are part of a much larger whole, humanity is ONE once we see and allow it.
Transform mistrust and fear into trust, judgment into compassion and blame into acceptance. Be wide open! Life becomes magical this way.
See this wounded child in everyone. See the innocence. As we embrace everyone, and we love everyone unconditionally, there cannot be separation. All there can be, is love without any boxes, labels, conditions or expectations.
ALL WE EVER NEEDED was to know that we are part of nature and this universe. That we were never separated. That we are cared for by Momma Earth and Poppa Sun, and by every single aspect of this big beautiful and wonderful superorganism. Yes, you are one important aspect of it, too! You are unique for exactly that reason, and nobody else can replace you!
Let me tell you dear friend and fellow traveler reading these lines. Yes, you! You are not alone. You are perfect. You are wonderful. You are an amazing human being. I see you.
From my heart to yours. We are all connected. We are all one. I love you always, in all ways.
ALL WE EVER NEEDED, was to remember.
#oneness #innerchild #selflove
*Absolicious ART “Love” by Alexander Milov, Odessa Ukraine